I am moving to Germany from the US in a year - Advise please

  • My wife is from Germany. She came over to the US on a cultural exchange visa about 4 years ago as an au pair (nanny). After being here for 1 year, we met and a year after that we were married in the US. She decided to return to her home (she lives in Rudolstadt, Germany) in January 2009. Our plan is for her to get a job there and then for me to follow her there by the end of 2009. I have many questions about the best way for me to go about this. Here is more information about my specific situation.
    My wife doesn’t know exactly what she wants to do for a career there. As proof of how diverse she is, she is currently deciding between being a police officer or a veterinarian assistant or possibly something else (she also has a secretary degree). My background is in sales, electronics, warehousing, retail management and operations.
    I understand some basic German language and can pick up on parts of conversations based on context, body language and the vocabulary that I know. I can’t say much of anything except for 3-4 word sentences and then usually I get wrong “der, die das”, mix up the word order or end words with the wrong endings. During the time before I move, I plan to study the language on my own through reading a textbook I have from college, listening to audiobooks and playing computer-based language games. I also plan to take a group class at a local German cultural center. When I do move there, our plan is for my first 3 months or so to be spent at a language school learning intensely.
    I have only visited Germany once for 2 weeks but I loved it. I want very much to move there but I have many questions that I need answered so I can start the process. I would appreciate any advice people have as well as any stories or experiences from people that have gone through anything similar. Below are the main questions I have.
    What is the best way to go about selling most of my possessions? I plan to sell most of my things on eBay and Craigslist. Some items like my clothing, furniture, bigscreen, floor-standing speakers, computer, etc. are not easy to get rid of in that fashion. Even if I did sell them, I think I wouldn’t get very much for them. I’d prefer to take them with me (not the furniture). The things is, I don’t know how much that would cost or the best way to go about it. Obviously your standard shipping companies are out of the question. I have looked into a moving service but don’t know which ones are good. I don’t need the items to get to Germany anytime soon. If it took a few months even, that would be fine.
    What is the best way to learn the language? As I said above, I plan to do many things to aid my learning. Is there one I should focus more of my energy on than the others? How many hours per week should I dedicate to learning to get the best results? How much can I expect to learn in the next year? Obviously, everyone is different and learns at different paces. Personally, I am not the best with language. I am more of a math and computers kind of person.
    What is the best way to find a job in Germany? With me not speaking German fluently, will that make it a lot harder or are there jobs where my English and partial German would be enough, at least until I lived there and learned through experience? What kind of jobs do people emigrating from the US usually occupy? I have heard of people actually teaching English classes with little German knowledge. We plan to move somewhere near her parents, in Rudolstadt or to Munich. It is possible that if she finds a job somewhere else we may move there though.
    Most importantly, I need advise on how to make our relationship strong over the next year when I will only see my wife a few times. With me working, learning the language, the expense of travel and not having much vacation time, I believe I may be able to go to Germany only once during the next year for about 10 days. With her starting a new career she may only be able to come to the US for a short time as well. We call each other and write emails currently. I just see the distance and time causing us to grow apart. Any tips for keeping it close even from across the ocean?
    I know that I have a lot of questions but if you have ANY advice, please share it. It is a huge life-changer, me moving there so I want to make sure I do it right and am thinking about all the angles. THANKS!

    29 Jan 2009, 04:58 Keith Hoffman
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Replies

  • I can't give you much advice...but me too.

    I am moving to Germany as an American born and raised. I met my fiance when she was an exchange student my senior year in high school. Two years later we are still going back and forth to see each other whenever we can and we're engaged. our situations are very similar... My German is not at all fluent, I don't know what to do for work, not sure where we'll live... etc.
    As for learning the language, I find the best way to learn vocabulary is with a dictionary and flashcards. Read or watch something in German and write down whatever words you can catch and look them up afterwards. Grammar is all about practice. Memorize the rules as well as you can and practice them. Some colleges offer a sort of "German as a second language" course, which is a single semester which supposedly helps greatly.
    One thing that we both may need to worry about is the fact that marriage (unlike in the U.S.) does not qualify us for German citizenship without abandoning our American citizenship.
    As for your relationship, I think the way I have done it is to let her know that you want to stay emotionally close, and show it by telling her you love and miss her regularly, or other intimate/personal things that you would say normally. A webcam is also better than just the phone, it is extremely nice to be able to see the person in addition to hearing them.

    Hope this helped, if not, at least you know you're not alone!

    Alex Hahn 16 Feb 2009, 08:31 - Report
  • wanting to move to german

    hey maybe you too can answer some questions or point me in a direction. i'm wanting to move to germany to live.i'm a nursing major in the us born and raised but, i want to be in medical field in germany. any ideas..? please email me [email removed] thanks for your time

    Gary Stewart 22 Feb 2009, 09:11 - Report
  • wanna visit Germany

    I learn German in college and its kind of difficult for me and the gramar is hard, but I want to visit Germany as soon as posible. Some people say that life there is so much betterblunk

    Leah 25 Feb 2009, 04:01 - Report
  • your move

    Hello there,

    Good luck with moving to Germany. That's a big step.
    I am German and moved 3 years ago to the US.
    Please don't hesitate to ask questions in case you still have some and I am more than willing to help you out.

    Dani 18 May 2009, 03:04 - Report
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